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I’ve had a subject brewing in my head for a really long time, but I’m not quite ready to write it yet. However, the thing I want to write about brought another topic to my mind: how do you and your mate deal with hardship?

Nothing tests a relationship like hardship. When people are starting to feel desperate, depressed, picked on by life and circumstance, used, abused and generally mistreated, it begins to take a toll on the relationship. How do you support your partner when they are having a hard time? Are you an eternal optimist, or are you a problem solver? Maybe you’re the moper in the relationship. Most importantly, how do you keep your disappointment about how life is going from coloring our relationship?

It’s been said that a large amount of divorces result from financial hardship. It never says whether the financial hardship is the eventual cause or the initial cause, but I happen to think it’s probably the latter. I know there are people who will leave just because you no longer have the money you did, but I also know that the stress of not having money can lead people to say and do hurtful things to the people they love. I know it gets hard to maintain a relationship when everything starts to become what you can’t do because you don’t have the money, at least in one or both of your minds.

Hardships bring limitations to our relationships. Sometimes, they force one person to feel over-responsible for making the other person happy or keep them encouraged. Sometimes, we just don’t have the right things to say or know what to do, which can paralyze some into saying nothing. When we don’t say anything, we seem uncaring.

So, how do you keep hardship from ruining your relationship? How do you work through hardship and come out a stronger, more loving couple? Or maybe you found you weren’t with the right person after all. Leave your two cents in the comments section, or email me at 2blu2btru4u[at]gmail[dot]com.

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