Every time my apartment complex decides to spray for bugs, they give us a one day notice, which wouldn’t be a bad thing if I didn’t go to work and get home after six p.m. I end up frantically pulling out drawers, taking out trash and sweeping floors all night, or leaving late for work in the morning trying to get it all done before I leave. It leaves me frayed at the edges and generally in a bad mood.
They leave this sheet of paper in the door knocker that tells you all of the things you need to do before the pest control people come and spray. Take all of your drawers out and take everything away from the wall. No standing water. No trash in any trash can. There can be no places for the little dying roaches that are coming out of their hiding place to crawl into and possibly live. You will see roaches even if you never knew you had roaches, because they come out when they are dying.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could pull out all of your inner drawers, clean everything up, and go to work, finding your apartment has been rid of all the hidden vermin in the interim? (So that was a run-on; work with me.) What would there be to exterminate in your life?
I keep thinking that I would like to exterminate a few people from my life, but that’s not a very good reflection on me. If they were bad people, why did I allow them into my life in the first place? I am not one of those people who goes around updating her facebook status with her intentions to cut people from her life and so forth, but the thought of someone coming in and indiscriminately getting rid of every kind of vermin in your life, without you standing around to point out which ones you want to keep, is a nice one.
Do we ever really know who we should keep and who we should let go? Is that why God keeps moving me around, changing how I think and where I am so that those who aren’t good for me fall away like dried barnacles. I pray a lot for God to show me how people fit in to my life, who is simply there to show me something. Who is there to stay. I pray about my boyfriend. What is Mr. Perfect’s purpose in my life? How long will he be here? Show me what I’m supposed to get out of this relationship. I ask the latter of all of my relationships, platonic or otherwise. What am I supposed to learn from knowing this person? How does my experience with this person help me?
I’m not doing any pest control. There are people in my life that are enigmas. I don’t know why some of those people are here, and until I do, I can’t remove them. I obviously don’t know all that I am to learn from their presence in my life, and who am I to tell God he put the wrong person here to teach me patience, or kindness, or gave me the wrong person to lean on?
RTD: There was a whole COLONY of spiders outside my front door, on the doorpost, yesterday…red ones. I about came up out of my skin, then managed to open the door around them, grab the bug spray, and end their lives. That was my extermination for the weekk. Everyone else, you are safe.