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I am 30 years old today.

Ladies and gents, it’s the big one. It’s a monumental birthday. I survived my twenties, all that jazz. Time to do something big. Chop all my hair off. Quit my job. Go on an African safari. Elope. Do. SOMETHING. Preferably something big and life altering. Things are never going to be the same after today.

Except…they are. You and I both know it. Change doesn’t really happen overnight or at the turn of a calendar page. The God I serve exists outside of time and isn’t confined by time, so when things are happening on his time, I can’t put my timetable on it. I am so content where I am! I’m alive! There are so many people in this world who have it so much worse than I do. I LOVE where I am and what I’ve accomplished!

Except…I don’t. Not really. I feel like I could have done so much more with thirty years. I know, there are people who are amazed at what I’ve done and who think that I am years ahead of where they were or I should be, but deep down, I know I was capable of even more in these years. I could have reached so many more women by now. I could have so many more books out. I could drown in or be smothered by all that I left undone and unsaid, opportunities I could never get back, but that’s not going to change a thing.

So, if I’m going to be honest with you about turning 30, I have to say that thirty feels…disjointed. Imbalanced. I’m vacillating between feeling grateful for what I have accomplished and feeling compelled to do more. I’ve spent a few years doing busy work and now I feel like I’m starting to do more of what some call walking in purpose and others call pursuing my passion, with a few more starts and a few less stops. I’ve made enough progress that I’ve left my comfort zone behind. It’s hard sometimes not to run back to its safety, but I’m getting better at being exposed.

I’m working on ideas that would have seems overwhelming a year ago. To me, that’s progress. Progress is so much better than not trying for fear of failure. I’ve had some “no’s” and setbacks, but I’m ultimately still moving forward, which is the only way to get anywhere.

So, 30 for 30. What do I want to work on the year I am thirty?

1. I want to write and publish another book.

2. I want to take more vacations.

3. I want to speak at least once at a conference.

4. I want to open an online shop for my books and other accessories.

5. I want to develop a class based on Altered before the Altar.

6. I want to publish a fiction book.

7. I want to turn my living space into a home.

8. I want to create a dedicated writing/office space in my home.

9. I want to lose 25 pounds.

10. I want to break a certain pay threshold (Yes, I have a number in mind; no I’m not telling).

11. Sell the next hundred (100) copies of Altered before the Altar.

12. Go to at least 3 more conferences.

13. Learn to create my own book covers.

14. Lead a class on self-publishing.

15. Start offering proofreading services.

16. Start a book club.

17. Register as a business.

18. Shoot at least one Youtube video

19. Start a podcast

20. Improve my business cards

21. Create a professional vendor table setup for events.

22. Run a 5k (actually run the whole time)

23. Find my fit/workout passion.

24. Drastically cut carbs.

25. Get a facial.

26. Get a professional massage.

27. Write a business  plan.

28. Start paying student loans consistently.

29. Contribute an article to a widely read magazine.

30. Develop my fashion sense/individual style.

I have to admit some of the items on the list scare me a bit. But the overwhelming feeling I have looking at this list is one of excitement. I know I can tick off every single one of these items if I work with God instead of going out ahead of Him. I believe it’s all within my reach and more importantly, in line with God’s will for my life. Now all that remains is to do it.



“30 years of awesome”