Enjoying the Journey…& a Book Cover Reveal!

Tags

book launch, faith, leap of faith, Memoir, new book, new release, preorder, publication, publishing, truth

I have a cover and a release date for Break Right: Finding Wholeness in Heartbreak, and a Good God in a Bad Breakup! This book has been, as Gretchen Saffles of Well Watered Women says, “soul scrubbing.” It is packed with truth and wisdom from in the breakup trenches, and I can’t wait to share it with everyone on March 13, 2018 (prayers solicited and appreciated!)

You can read the full description and pre-order your copy of Break Right here, on my website.

The journey from idea to publication for this book has been a non-stop rollercoaster ride, and I am here for it! It’s taken me a little under nine months to get this book written, organized, and formatted, find and engage a graphic designer to do the cover, and make all things ready for the release. This is my faster book from inception to completion ever. It’s also my most personal book, and the process of bringing it to life has truly been a journey worth taking.

When I first had the idea to write a book about breakups, and mine in particular, I wasn’t sure how to do it well. I didn’t want to bash my ex or garner sympathy for myself. I wanted to show that a break up involves breaking, yes, but if you focus on your faith and seek truth during this season, you will be stronger and more whole because of the experience.

Balancing being truthful about my experience and sharing biblical truth wasn’t hard, but deciding what to share was. I had to question why I wanted the reader to know certain things about me or my relationship. Would this truly help the reader receive some truth, or would it make me feel better or satisfy my craving to be known and supported?

The second hardest thing was to frame some of the truths I’ve come to realize about how we process breakup that block us from true healing and keep us repeating the same patterns in future relationships. I tried as much as possible to dig deep and share how these truths applied to me instead of hitting women over the head with the fact they probably did it to. Learning to be sensitive with others, and myself, was a major growth experience.

Now that the journey to publishing this book is almost over, I can’t help but be proud of this book. I know there are many women hurting from breakups who can benefit from the shift in perspective this book provides. I truly believe something wonderful has happened within the pages of this book. Even women who think they are over a past breakup can discover some areas of brokenness they didn’t realize were there and get healing for them (I know I did–several times).

A word about the cover. I shared the cover with an indie author group I’m a part of and a few people suggested the cover should have things like a carton of ice cream or wads of tissue on the front to show that it’s a book about breakups. I’ll share the full story behind the cover later, but I wanted to say this isn’t a typical breakup book. I specifically did not put those things on the cover. I also didn’t put a broken heart on the cover, but a whole one. I purposely avoided saying anything like “breakups suck,” “it’s his loss” or “I’m so sorry” in the description. I’m trying to change the narrative around breakups and shift perspectives back to Christ, not play into what we’re supposed to believe or do in the wake of a breakup based on popular culture.

If you’re interested in Break Right, I encourage you to pre-order. It’s $9.99 on pre-order, and free shipping with the code BREAK FREE. You also get some cool pre-order goodies. After pre-orders, the price goes up to $14.99 plus shipping and the goodies don’t come free any longer.

There are so many other things I want to share and write about, but they’ll have to wait until another post. I just wanted to share my excitement with you about my upcoming release and check in with y’all. How y’all doing? What’s new and exciting in your life? Have a question about the book? Leave your two cents in the comments section.

XOXO,

Erica

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Rejoicing & Mourning

Tags

achievement, comparison, discontent, empathy, faith, friends, goals, love, mourn, perspective, rejoice, writing

It’s been a busy week for me in the “rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn” life. One of my critique partners terminated her contract with her publisher and decided to self-publish her book after it had been released for a day. She found a cover designer and re-released her book very quickly. I’m so proud of how she handled the situation and acted so promptly to get it turned around. My other critique partner got an agent AND sold her book to Harlequin Love Inspired Suspense through their Killer Voices competition. Three books have been bought through the competition in two days! We’ve all been celebrating these writers and their achievements. The last piece of my writing circle, my beta reader, has been on vacation all week long relaxing in the sun with her love and his family. All around me, there are wonderful things happening.

In my soon to be published book for single women, I have what I’m calling an “in the meantime” section on being happy for others while dealing with discontentment. The bible tells us to rejoice with those who rejoice and to mourn with those who mourn, but what does that really mean? How can you be happy for someone when you aren’t happy with where you are in life? How can you mourn with someone when things are going great in your life? Why is this important?

Over the years, I’ve had a lot of experience in this area. I’ve survived many waves of engagements, weddings, and baby showers. I’ve seen several friends lose their mothers, fathers, or close family and friends. I’ve seen friends receive “the call” in publishing as well as many receiving rejections or getting burned by publishing deals that have gone bad. None of these things happened in a vacuum when NOTHING was going on in my life. I had to decide to be there for them while going through my own things.

The call to rejoice or mourn with others wasn’t written to punish us, to rub salt in wounds, or to make us feel superior to anyone else. It was to teach us empathy and to get outside of ourselves. In order to celebrate with others, I have to put aside my disappointments, which I was supposed to roll onto the Lord anyway. When you mourn with people, you begin to be grateful for what you have and stop coveting or being greedy to obtain. Both of these are things that WE need. It also shows us our hearts. When we are truly close to people, we want the best for them and we want to be there for them when things aren’t the best.

Two pieces of advice I give in the book is to truly get to know the people you fellowship with and to pray for others in positions you would like to be in one day. Getting to know people outside of their social media or the image they project, getting to see the hard work and dedication that they put into achieving will help you to be happy for them when they finally achieve their goals. It’s called investment. If you believe someone got a promotion they aren’t qualified for, instead of being upset, pray that they can acquire the skills to do the job. These two principles really shifted my perspective on getting engaged and getting married. I was able to get beyond what I wanted and truly see others. I was able to get the focus off of myself and my selfish wants and use my life to impact others.

You’ll have to wait for the book to get the other eight points. 😀

It’s been a bit of a roller coaster ride this week. I’ve been swamped at work because people are out, a tropical storm is threatening, all the work is hitting my desk at once, and the side hustle has picked up. Things are getting to be hurry up and wait with the book (got the cover artist–hurry up!; book is out with people to beta read–waiting!). My critique partners are kicking butt. Harlequin online community friends ALL seemed to have a book out this week (and my wallet is screaming at me to stop. Buying. Books). I am struggling to get words on the page. There aren’t enough hours in the day and at the same time there are too many hours in the working day. It’s been a week, people! But I’m so happy that I got to celebrate with my sweet friends, to focus on something other than this dragging, sagging, “I could have sworn it was Tuesday twice this week” week.

So stop being a wet blanket, a hater, a backbiter, complainer, covetous or envious fuddy duddy, or an arrogant, conceited, condescending showoff and take on someone else’s joys and hurts. Let’s grow together.

XOXO,

Erica

Hunger Pains: Insights on Esau & His Birthright

Tags

Bible, Bible study, birthright, book, Esau, hunger, perspective

The legacy of Esau has always intrigued me. While his father and brother are highlighted in the “golden chapter” on faith, Hebrews 11, Esau is listed with the fornicators and is called “profane” (or “godless” depending on your translation). When he went to his father for his blessing, he didn’t receive it. Even though he sought it, he couldn’t take back his choice (or found no repentance). I wondered for a long time why Esau was called godless, why his godlessness was linked with fornication. How are these things linked?

It’s easy to say “I just can’t understand why Esau would give up his birthright for a meal. I would never do that.” But the longer I studied this scripture, the more I realized that I, and maybe you, have done this more than once. What God showed me in Esau’s story is the effect of hunger on us. Esau isn’t the only “hungry” person I found in my study. I realized that a lot of us are trading our birthrights to satisfy temporary hungers and it convicted me enough to write this post.

In our lives, we can be “hungry” for many things. Some women are hungry for a husband. Some are hungry for professional advancement. Some are hungry for children. Some are hungry for material gain. Not all of the things we want are bad; it’s when our hunger for them leads us away from God that they become a problem.

In Esau’s case, he was physically hungry. He had been out in the field and came in so hungry he was faint and weak. He insists that he’s on the point of death he is so hungry. He tells Jacob that his birthright wouldn’t be any good to him if he were dead, and he carelessly gives it away for food. After he eats, he gets up and goes on his way, not realizing what he has given up.

I wonder why Esau didn’t come in sooner and address his hunger. Why did he let himself get so hungry he’s sure he’ll die if he doesn’t have food. Yet we let things become such an urgent need for us that they become all we can focus on. We convince ourselves that we will die for want of them. For example, when I started writing my book, I really wanted to get married. I focused so much on getting married that I would throw up wedding plans and marriage guides. If anything had marriage in its title, it had my attention. I was willing to listen to just about anyone’s philosophy on love and marriage. I was hungry for it. There’s a term for being so hungry that you lose your ability to function as yourself, hangry. I’ve felt that several times over. Esau was convinced he was at death’s door. It’s my opinion that he wasn’t really at the point of death– if he were, he wouldn’t have eaten and then been able to go on his way as if he weren’t dying minutes ago–but I know that phantom feeling that you’re just going to die if you don’t have something you want because I’ve lived with it. Here’s the thing, though–I’m still here! I didn’t die because I didn’t get married. You won’t die if you don’t get whatever, either. Unless it is a medical necessity that you have it, you’ll be just fine.

Esau also went to the wrong person. Esau and Jacob struggled with each other in their mother’s womb. Their differences further separated them. Jacob was more concerned with what he could get out of his brother than helping him. Sometimes when we are hungry, we go to the wrong person to fulfill our needs. The women we talk to about wanting a husband don’t have husbands; the people we complain about our jobs with are unemployed or underemployed. We look to men to fill us and we wonder why we are still hungry.

Esau didn’t understand the discrepancy between what he was receiving and what he was giving away. The birthright of the firstborn entitled him to an inheritance of property and other benefits that were worth far more than a meal. Esau also lost his blessing from Isaac when Jacob impersonated him. What he received in return was so minimal in comparison. Several times in the New Testament, the Bible identifies Christians as heirs (Romans 8:17; Titus 3:7; Gal. 3:29; 4:7). We are in line to inherit the promises of God. But we often give that birthright away in favor of temporary fulfillment. The wages of sin is death and separation from God. So when we give in to temptation and fornicate, commit adultery, lie, steal, gossip, etc., we are exchanging our inheritance for death. These people have no place in God’s kingdom and no part of His inheritance.

We have to stop going from temporary satisfaction to temporary satisfaction that are moving us further and further away from God and aren’t even fulfilling us. Christ tells the woman at the well that whoever drinks water from the well will thirst again, but whoever drinks the water He will give them will never thirst again. That’s true fulfillment and satisfaction. The difference with being hungry for a relationship with God is that our hunger will be satisfied. The bible says “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness; for they shall be filled.”

There are other things that I got out of this study, but you’ll have to buy my book when it comes out to read about them. 😉 I’m so excited about the last little areas of the book coming together. It’s a lot more in-depth than I could have imagined when I started writing it.

Submission and Surrender

Tags

burdens, Christ, discontent, discouragement, faith, God, Prayer, relationships, submission, surrender

I haven’t done an update in a while on my submission goal for the year. I’ve been reflecting on this lately and have a few things I would like to share. So, ahem…

I’ve been locked in a power struggle with myself for a few weeks now. I sent in Delivering Justice for the second time three weeks ago today, and I’ve been trying not to think about it. I’ve done a much better job this time. My email refresh button has gotten a lot more rest this time around. It’s not that I’m not worried about what is going on with it, but that I have come to accept that at this moment, its fate is in someone else’s hands. I can’t do anything more for it. I can’t send her my latest revisions or make her publish it; my part is over for the moment.

This is so much easier to realize in writing submissions than in spiritual submission. Recently someone close to me has been having a difficult time with life. REALLY difficult. I’m the cheerleader, the encourager, the person who sees it as my personal mission to pull everyone out of the doldrums kicking and screaming if I have to. I never really feel like I get anywhere with this individual, though. I feel like they listen to what I have to say but don’t believe it has any real bearing on what they are going through. I can quote scripture, speak from my own experience, or repeat every motivational quote I can think of, but I just can’t be them, and therefore I have no clue what the right thing to do or say is to make them feel better.

This week when things got difficult, they asked to be left alone for a few days. I wasn’t feeling this plan. Worries abounded in my head. But this seems like a sign of depression. But what if they do this or that? But the thing is, we all reach a point where we need to pull away at some time or another. Even Jesus left his disciples and the multitudes to pray and be with God by Himself. The truth is, nothing that I do ever seems to be enough because I’m not the one responsible for this person’s happiness. It doesn’t matter who it is in my life that needs me; I can’t fulfill all of their needs.

In Galatians, we are told to bear one another’s burdens, yes, but ultimately we are admonished to roll our cares onto Christ. I had to turn this person’s confusion, discontent and unhappiness with their current situation over to God. It was way too big for me. I couldn’t handle it. I’m not supposed to handle it.

A big part of submission is trust. When you hand someone something precious, and you don’t let go until you’re sure they have a good grip on it, that they aren’t going to drop it. I have to trust that God has a good grip on this person. Perhaps my constant interference has been disrupting what God is trying to show them. Maybe my “help” has been more of a hindrance. So lately I’ve been working on surrendering. I’m learning to trust God with those things that are too big for me to handle. I’m learning to trust the second part of the process. Once I give something to Him, it’s out of my hands.

This is something I’m trying to keep at the forefront of all my relationships and interactions with people. When I marry one day, even as I submit to my husband, there will still be things he can’t handle or be responsible for, things I need to take to God and submit to Him about. There will be times when my support and encouragement isn’t enough, when my husband needs to submit that area to God. People aren’t responsible for our happiness or contentment, and we shouldn’t hold them responsible for our discontentment or dissatisfaction. All of those Psalms where David directs his petitions to God and tells God that He alone can accomplish what David is seeking after Him to do should have clued me in to this, but sometimes it just has to be personal.

Praying for everyone struggling with depression, discontent, dissatisfaction, or decisions they need to make to move out of those places.

XOXO,

Erica

Lost Things

Tags

attitude, Christ, conviction, dilligence, importance, lost, parables, perspective, seeking, sinners

I have more fingernail/toenail clippers and tweezers than any one person should ever have. There’s a perfectly good explanation for this. Every time I would misplace a pair, I would look for them everywhere. I searched every plausible place for them and couldn’t find them. When I got tired of looking for them, I would buy another pair. This happened over and over again. It was like an epidemic with me.

While doing some much needed spring cleaning, I’ve come across many things I thought were gone for good, like all these pairs of clippers and tweezers. Isn’t it amazing how that happens? Sometimes when you stop looking for something, you find it. Yet finding all of those lost things convicted me.

In Luke chapter 15, Christ shares three parables about lost things. He tells us how they became lost, how people reacted to their being lost, how people found them, and how they reacted to finding them. Jesus spoke these parables when the scribes and Pharisees criticized him for receiving sinners, so it can be concluded that the lost He is illustrating here are lost sinners.

Brother Drummer did a wonderful set of lessons on these parables showing the uniqueness of each parable’s message as well as their similarities. The main things that stand out in my reading of the scripture are that none of these things know that they are lost; someone is looking diligently for them, and; when they are found, people are called together to rejoice over finding them.

In contrast, I had stopped looking for my clippers long ago and replaced them. I was pleasantly surprised when I came across them again, but I didn’t rejoice and I certainly didn’t call anyone to rejoice with me. This would be fine if it only pertained to clippers and such, but it doesn’t. As I gathered all of them into a pile, I thought about all of the lost people that I pass every day and never try to bring to Christ. I thought about all the people I’ve stopped seeing at church who I never went looking for. I thought about how little enthusiasm I am wont to show when people have been away and return.

It seems that I have an attitude problem. Even more troubling, I have a focus problem. Sometimes I get so focused on me, myself and I, what I’m going through, what I need to do, that I forget that seeking and saving the lost is important. More importantly, I forget that I’m not looking for something that can be replaced; I’m looking for people, individuals that are important enough to God that he sent me to look for them.

Perhaps reading this you realize that you’re like me. Maybe you haven’t been as enthusiastic about finding the lost as you could be. Perhaps there are some people you stopped seeing at church that you haven’t reached out to. Maybe you have a group that you keep up with and pray for but you’ve stopped looking for others to bring to salvation. If this convicts you in any way, go to the Father. Repent. Start changing your attitude toward seeking and saving the lost.

The truth is, those clippers and tweezers were never going to cry out to me to let me know where they were. They didn’t know that they were lost, and I didn’t care enough to continue looking beyond what was convenient for me. When I’ve lost something of greater importance, I refused to stop looking until I found it. It’s time to bring that attitude to the areas that God says are important. That’s my conviction, anyway.

XOXO,

Erica

This is part of an ongoing series of post pertaining to getting serious about who we are in Christ. You can go to www.aseriousseason.com to learn more about my pledge to make this time in my life The Season for Getting Serious. The graphic was created for me by Jada Prather.

Learning in Silence

Tags

confidence, growth, learning, Psalms, quiet, silence, solitude, trust

The last few days I’ve been particularly quiet. I’ve spent a lot more time studying submission and scriptures related to being a woman, trying to ferret out the particular strengths and weaknesses inherent in being a woman in order to be a better one. I’ve been more in the mindset of “soaking it in” than putting in my two cents, and I feel like God is speaking to me through scripture on some things I felt he was silent on before.

Yesterday we studied the last psalm in the book of Psalms and talked about what the overall message of the book of Psalms was. The commentary at the beginning of the book of Psalms in my Bible says the unifying characteristic of all the psalms is “that the writers have a serene confidence in God’s guidance and provision.” This statement stuck with me all night. As I considered the psalms, no matter what the psalmist was asking for–deliverance, vengeance, forgiveness, mercy, blessings, curses on enemies–what he was praising God for or inviting other to praise God for, he always showed a supreme confidence in that God was at work and in control, that God could do what He wanted in any situation despite who opposed Him.

There are so many relationships in which we cannot trust. People leave, walk away, neglect responsibilities, pop in and out of our lives at their own whims. People will make us gods and place expectations on us that we could never live up to. People disappoint us and break our hearts. People’s hands are tied and they couldn’t help us if they wanted to. Sometimes people just don’t know how to deal with us, nor we with them. But it’s comforting to know that God can be trusted. We can tell Him anything we want. We can trust His loyalty to us when we are loyal to Him. Not only can He provide a listening ear, He can actually DO something in EVERY situation. Beyond that, God knows us and cares for us. He didn’t miss a few episodes of our lives.

During the past few weeks, I’ve been able to see God work when I’ve taken my hand and mouth off of things. I’m learning in silence. I’m learning to pull away and spend time with God. I’m learning to recognize his voice in the see of all the other voices that seek residence in my thoughts. I know I’ve already written about this, but at that point I was still struggling with the silence. I wanted to write about this place, the sweet spot where quiet certainty and trust replaces the frantic first days of silence.

Be blessed everyone,

Erica

P.S. A sister in Christ at my church lost her job this week. Please pray that she finds a new one soon, and that this time serves to strengthen her faith, increase her wisdom, and grow her character rather than increasing her anxiety and distractions in her life.

Celebrating Submission

Tags

anxiety, change, goals, silence, submission, surrender, tongue

If you follow me on Facebook or Instagram, then you’ve seen my quotes from an old favorite I am rereading through new eyes, A Celebration of Discipline by Richard J. Foster. I’m not reading the whole book; rather, I’m rereading the section on the discipline of submission to start my year long focus on submission. So far, I’m seeing a lot of things, both in the text and in myself, that I did not see before.

I’m having a rough time adjusting to some of the changes I’ve been making, and I’m not the only one. Change is never easy for me, and getting so far out of my comfort zone is an exercise in humility and tongue biting like I’ve never had before. In ..A Celebration of Discipline, Foster states that “usually the best way to handle most matters of submission is to say nothing.” That’s a hard one for me. As someone who feels the need to justify, clarify, and be taken seriously, it’s difficult sometimes not to say exactly how I feel. I’m used to picking and choosing my words carefully, but having to say nothing, to just surrender it and watch God work it out is both a relief and an anxiety.

The thing is, I can already see how much my decision to change has affected my environment. I already see God working. My boss asked me to organize my workspace a certain way. I happen to think that I work just fine in my workspace the way I had it organized, but at the same time, changing it to suit her wasn’t going to make it more difficult for me to get things accomplished. So I began to work on it. My workspace is a lot more efficient, my boss is happy with it, and I still get work on. A coworker even gave me a Sony alarm to play my iPod on that fits a lot better into my workspace, an unexpected bonus that allowed me to bring my sound bar home to enjoy.

There have been a few small victories and a LOT of anxieties and uncertainties. There have been a lot of moments when I want to give up and slide back into old habits, especially when it comes to the tongue. But I have no doubt that I’m going in the right direction, even with things around me start to look a little unfamiliar.

I hope that the lesson today at church is just what I need to hear to keep me encouraged.

XOXO,

Erica

The Word of the Year for 2014

Tags

goals, God, obedience, submit, surrender, word of the Year

*I was supposed to post this a long time ago; I’ve known what the word for the year is since New Years, if not before. It wasn’t uncertainty over what the word should be that kept me from posting, but the momentous, life changing nature of the word, and the sentiments behind it, paralyzed me for a bit. I know only God can make my pursuit of this for this year a success; that’s part of the reason I know this is the right word*

I’m not going to give a bunch of fanfare before I dive into the word of the year for 2014; I’m just going to put it out there. My word of the year is submit. There, I said it. That wasn’t so bad.

I didn’t want to say it…er, write it. I was hesitant to commit the word to paper…or the internet, because it means so many different things as it pertains to this year. No other word fully represented and encompassed what this year needs to be about for me.I didn’t want to be controversial at all in my choice, although I realize to some it will appear as if I am. I simply wanted to be truthful to where I am and where I want to go in this year.

Some definitions:

• to give (a document, proposal, piece of writing, etc.) to someone so that it can be considered or approved.
• to stop trying to fight or resist something; to agree to do something that you have been resisting or opposing.
• to yield oneself to the authority or will of another; surrender
• to defer to or consent to abide by the opinion or authority of another.

There are so many areas of my life in which the word submit needs to become entrenched! The most obvious area, and the easiest to do, would be in the area of achieving my goal to be a published writer. I have to press the submit button several times this year to get my writing in front of someone who might believe in it enough to publish it. I’ve even made some positive steps to prepare a couple things for submission. But the physical and spiritual implications are so much greater.

One area in my life in which I want to embrace the meaning or submit that pertains to surrender is in my relationship. My relationship needs to be submitting to God. Absolutely. Not only that, though, but I need to surrender the death grip that I’ve had on moving things along. I’ve already done a few things to move in this direction, but more things are required. *Y’all, I really don’t want to say this, but I’m going to, and please hold me to it* I need to stop trying to evaluate and predicate things upon an uncertain future outcome & instead consult God on how he wants me to proceed. No more trying to orchestrate things, either. To that end, no more hinting, nagging, lamenting, arm twisting, or complaining about my relationship to anyone but God.

I’ve been fasting from relationship related media–no Say Yes to the Dress or Four Weddings, no ratchet TV like Love & Hip Hop with their jacked up relationships, no hash tag or tag check for engagement, wedding, marriage or related terms on blogs or Instagram. I DID see that my cousin was engaged on Facebook and I liked the status, but other than that–nothing. I’m cutting off those avenues of comparison. What happens with my relationship will happen when it is supposed to happen. Easier said than done, but I’m working on it.

This doesn’t begin to touch on how submit can be applied to my relationship with God, bringing my body into submission, bringing my mouth into submission, or the other areas I’ve already identified that will benefit from this word. I’ll share more about Project Submit as the month wears on.

What’s your word for the year? How are you going to use it to impact your life? Have you made any steps toward achieving your 2014 goals?

XOXO

Erica

The Habit of Mediocrity

Tags

change, coasting, faith, goals, God, mediocrity, New Year, progress, repentance, running, stagnation

I recently decided to make some large changes in my life, and I find myself struggling with them a bit. One reason is because the way I used to do thing had become a habit, a bad habit. But whether good or bad, habits are hard to break.

A person like me loves to reminisce about what I used to do sometimes because what I used to do sounds so awesome. How I used to be before forming more recent habits was a lot closer to where I wanted to be, so it can be easy to try to reach back for it. I would say that there’s no progress in going back, but there is:

We all want progress, but if you’re on the wrong road, progress means doing  an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who  turns back soonest is the most progressive.

C. S. Lewis 

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/cslewis132782.html#dKyddWTzUFYCKWmc.99

Of course, we can never go back to the way that it was because we aren’t who we were, but reinstituting old habits isn’t attempting to go back in time if they are the habits of the right road. This is an illustration of repentance. Repentance is a turning away from sin and a turning back to God. Scripture says if we draw near to God, He will draw near to us (James 4:8).

I titled this the Habit of Mediocrity for a reason. In recent memory, I think that I’ve been caught up in “good enough.” I haven’t been striving anymore, just coasting. Even one step is closer to your goal than you were before and all of that. I’ve been stuck on “getting by,” on working hard enough to have just enough to get from one day to the next, and often falling short a few days. I’ve been existing and surviving and not living and thriving. Which would be perfectly fine if life were supposed to be without progress. No one goes to war with the objective neither to advance nor to retreat; if life is a war, the point is to win battles and conquer territories.

In his last sermon of 2013, Bro. Harvey Drummer stated that if our life has grown stagnant, it’s because we are living in sin. It took me off guard at the moment, but I wrote it down to ponder. He referenced Psalms 1:1-3. Those who delight in God and meditate on his word are planted by rivers of water, growing fruit, not wilting. God is life, and growth; he produces fruit in our lives. Ergo if we aren’t producing fruit…

Jesus says that those trees or branches that aren’t producing good fruit will be cut down and cast into the fire (Matt 7:19; John 15:2,6). In John 15:3, Jesus tells us that we cannot produce fruit by ourselves, that we only produce fruit when we abide in Him. So if we aren’t producing fruit, we are not abiding in Him, which means we are in sin.

So if I’m not getting anywhere or feel stagnant, I need to check my life. I need to repent of my sins and confess them. I need to be forgiven. Most importantly, I need to abide in Christ.

One of my favorite passages of scripture used to be I Cor. 9:24-27:

²⁴ Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. ²⁵ Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. ²⁶ Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. ²⁷ No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

Doing just enough to get by, doing good enough, and coasting aren’t going to get you anywhere and are not Biblical principles at all. The Bible talks about giving more than eye service (Eph. 6:6) or lip service Matt 15:8-9) to the things we are supposed to do. We are to do it all as if we are doing it to/for the Lord (Col 3:23). Once we put our hand to the plow, we aren’t to get distracted, but to go forward (Luke 9:59-62). Just because we took the steps to sign up for this Christian race and trained for it doesn’t mean we’ve already won it. We have to live life, or run, in a way that we obtain the prize.

There are many scriptures that talk about running this race and achieving the prize, but this one speaks to where I am in my life. I have to stop running aimlessly and beating the air. I need to run this race with purpose. I’ve trained myself to be mediocre. That’s a hard pill to swallow, but it’s the truth. Now it’s time to lay aside every weight and sin that has so easily beset me, especially the sin of slothfulness, and run with patience the race set before me (Heb. 12:1). I pray that you will do the same.

Lacing up my running shoes,

Erica

You CAN Do It Alone

Tags

dependency, finances, goals, God, money, trust

I think I need to write a sternly worded letter to myself. I have been on a mission this year to make sure I was doing…no more waiting around for this girl. I have been doing a lot of things I’ve been meaning to do and really coming into my own, but there are still a few more frontiers that need to be worked on. One of those is the financial sphere of my life.

I gave up on ever getting things paid off and getting ahead financially as a single person. My mantra has become “I will never be able to pay off my student loans as a single person.” In all honestly, I haven’t been able to pay ON my student loans in a while, let alone pay the OFF, but this negative thinking and surrendered attitude aren’t going to get me any closer to that goal.

I started a campaign at work to make a case for more money come review time. I know I can’t afford to be in a position where I only get the standard two percent, not if I’m going to make any strides financially. I’ve recently taken on new responsibilities. I am also angling for a new title that fully encompasses what I do. I think that once I have a new job title/description where people can more clearly see just how much more I do this year than last year, it will be easier to build a case for more money. But this little plan of mine will take some time before I see any fruit.

What I can change right now is my attitude and my spending. I am going to have to cut down my cost of living somehow if I’m going to get ahead. I checked into other options for my cable and internet, but the plan I have now is cheaper than the other comparable plans. I have lowered both my car insurance and car payment this year already. I just need to find a few more areas where I can cut back and stay away from cash advances in order to see light at the end of the tunnel.

I can’t depend on a man, a roommate, or moving home to help me get on top of MY debt. This surrendered attitude doesn’t serve me, and it shows I’m putting my trust and hopes for security in the wrong place. I can’t depend on people or my job to ensure my needs are provided for; I can’t even depend on myself. I haven’t completely given this area over to God. It took me a long time to realize that while I’ve made great strides in this area, I still hadn’t let go completely.

What are you having trouble letting go of/changing your attitude about?

XOXO,

Erica

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